This morning I was cleaning up the kitchen when I heard cries of panic coming from the bathroom. I ran in and found my two-year old holding her hand out exclaiming, quite loudly, that she had poop all over it. Apparently she struggled a bit as she made an attempt to complete her toilet duties. I went and got a baby wipe, came back and made an effort to explain that this is something that requires parental assistance!
I must be honest that while I haven’t had to clean hands like this before, this is a common battle I fight with my sweet little girl. She is the most independent of all of my children. She won’t let me help her get dressed, I can’t wash her hair, and she began feeding herself about the time of her first birthday. I think her first words were, “I do it!” I have had to decide what is worth the battle and what is not! Many times she will come to me with her head through the sleeve on her shirt and ask for my help. Other times she completely surprises me at the tasks that she is able to complete without any help at all.
I get incredibly frustrated with her at times, my patience is tested more than I care to admit! If you ask my mom she will tell you that my daughter comes by this independent streak very naturally. When I share one of my moments of insanity with my mom she reminds me that I am simply paying for my raising. It is such a challenge for me to let her go and make mistakes, but in the midst of my frustrations I try to imagine how God must feel. I am often guilty of doing similar things to Him. He tells me how to do something, I think I know how to do it on my own and then when I end up with poop on my hands I come back begging for help!
I am so incredibly thankful that God is not as impatient as I am! He doesn’t sigh deeply in frustration or raise his voice when I get out there and do things my own way. He lets me go and then welcomes me back when I realize my need for Him. He doesn’t have an agenda or pride to feed, he just wants me! He wants me to want him and to trust Him to lead me in the right direction. Man……I have a lot to learn!!!
About Benjamin he said: “Let the beloved of the LORD rest secure in him, for he shields him all day long, and the one the LORD loves rests between his shoulders.” Deuteronomy 33:12
Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths. ” Proverbs 3:5-6